Our daughter Riley (13) woke up one day and said, “Golf.” She wanted to learn how to play, so she decided to try out for the Valley Springs Middle School team. I was so inspired by her declaration. The family affiliation with golf is of the Putt-Putt and miniature varieties. (Golf enthusiasts: I have mad respect, and I realize these are not real golf.) I also had a stint, decades ago, waitressing at a country club, which included driving a golf cart around to serve drinks to players. How cool of Riley to just wake up and decide to blaze a new path. She also seems to have a “I’ll figure it out trait” that I admire.

This reminded me of a Van Gogh quote I once saw hanging on a coworker’s desk wall. “If you hear a voice within you say, ‘You cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.”

You don’t have to be born a pro or gifted in something to do it. Action silences doubt. With a single decision, you can wake up and just try something your brain tells you that you cannot do. You can figure it out as you go.

That’s what happened when two friends of mine in my Toastmasters club texted me to see if I wanted to enter a district speech contest. I was on a business trip in Orlando at the time, happy from sunshine and palm trees, so I immediately responded enthusiastically, “Yes! Sounds fun!” When I returned to Asheville and my work desk, it was more like, “What was I thinking?” It’s hard enough to give a speech in front of a sea of staring faces, why did I volunteer to deliver a speech in a competition format? I have real work to do; I don’t have time to do a speech contest!

Doubt and the cloud of resistance it creates are tricky little obstacles. Doubt can stop you in your tracks if you let it. I didn’t want to bail on my commitment. I tried to convince my brain that giving a speech would be fun and I reminded myself to just practice (growth mindset) and let go of any outcomes. After all, the message of my speech is what mattered most.

Doubt did its sneak attacks: What if you freeze? What if your thoughts drop off a cliff? This was a five-to-seven-minute speech without notes or a computer. You are judged on speech development, effectiveness, value (original thought), vocal variety, body language, grammar and interaction with the audience. Judges sat among the audience, undistinguished from other members. Each of the speakers drew a playing card to determine speaking order. I drew an ace, meaning I was up first.

Did I do it? Yes. Did I win? No.

But man, was I elated when it was over. I could not believe I did it. Delivering my speech almost felt like an out-of-body experience. Who is up here delivering this? I’m much more comfortable writing behind my computer monitor, thank you very much. At the same time, I know that if we limit ourselves to only what’s comfortable, we are creating our own invisible prison.

You know what really motivated me to follow through? I was tired of being scared. It’s exhausting not doing something that you really want to do. It’s an energy vampire.

Once I started my speech, it felt good up there talking to the audience. I felt in a groove. I’d even venture to say it was ... Fun! I proved to myself that I can actually do it and not die. Not only did I want to do it again (and better), this experience had me asking, “What else can I do that I don’t think I can do?”

That’s the best prize.

I took in the whole night with curiosity. I wrote down technical aspects I hope to work on: practice strong endings, work on vocal variety and incorporate more humor. I jotted down thematic takeaways from other speeches:

The words and stories of others can inspire us.

One woman in the audience, a stranger in the back, kept nodding at me as I made my points about the importance of breaking cycles for our children. Her rapt attention and response to my speech felt like a moment of meaningful connection.

My Toastmaster friends were also in the audience rooting for me. They also were competing. Their support was a powerful reminder of how our circle of friends can influence and encourage us to take risks and do things that are sometimes hard to do on our own.

There are so many things we will miss out on if we don’t tackle what’s hard with intention. Many doors will stay closed if we don’t at least try.

Maybe we are supposed to say a fast “Yes” before doubt creeps in to make the decisions. Maybe we are supposed to wake up and say, “Golf” – whatever “golf” is for you.