February may be the shortest month, but it packs a lot of action. On December 26, the elves got off their shelves and swept into supermarkets to “Hearten Up” the seasonal aisle, the candy aisle and all the end caps with Valentine Candy. The usual silver wrapped “Kisses” chocolates have succumbed to romantic pink and white ones. Santa balloons have made way for heart shaped ones, and the floral display now boasts red roses and actually any flower that can be dyed red. These are augmented by outlandish price tags – no doubt to cover the elves’ overtime pay.

A similar switch happened on radio and TV. The only ring now fits a certain finger, and the only ringing is the metaphoric cash register as advertisers lure us to tap plastic in exchange for rocks. 

Fortunately, we get a break from candy and hearts and can focus on our award winning tail gate snacks for THE EVENT Sunday February 8th. There is “discussion” between spouses about whose appetizer to take to the party: Grandad’s legacy of the kickin’ burnin’ firin’ wings (best accompaniment to cold beer) or that horseradish, cream cheese, avocado etc. dip. “Rock, paper, scissors” decides which. These monumental decisions enervate us out of the stupor of the numbing fortnight prior to The Game when all we hear from the sports media is talk, talk, talk. Dare I suggest that after this fortnight, the “stupor bowl” metamorphoses into the “Super Bowl” on that magic Sunday? 

For rugby, cricket and soccer fans like me, the Super Bowl highlights are the ads (yes the ONLY time I watch them on TV…mmm actually it’s the only time I watch football too) and the half time show. Naughty Rabbit, better known as Bad Bunny, is going to rock the stadium and the airwaves and the millions watching with his extraordinary energy and voice. Bravo that he will sing in his mother tongue of Spanish. (Here’s a hint: you can find his lyrics translated into English, or whatever language you speak, online) I will not be able to move like him, but I can at least sing along! A quick question: in “Me Porto Bonito” (translated I’ll behave nicely) he actually sings: “ I’ll behave nicely if you ask me to.” Question is: has he been asked?

So post game, it’s game on for lovers. She knows he is going to propose because her sorority sisters have said so. They help her buy just the right outfit and give her a pre-engagement gift of a deluxe manicure so that the important finger does not disappoint. 

And him? Well his frat brothers have been oiling him up (so to speak) for this event. Knowing how nervous he is, they’ve assigned the largest brother to be ready for a tush push with the others as back up, to make sure he not only scores a first down but the goal in mind. 

He arrives with the little box that contains his future reciting Bad Bunny’s lines

and praying for that miraculous Touch Down that is marriage.